Choose Love

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My daughter is 17. Before long she will attend University and begin what will be an exciting, beautiful, and wonderful life on her own. I am sure life will throw her the occasional curveball but she’s a first rate person, and will handle life and all it’s complications with aplomb. We are so very blessed. With family, our urban family, and friends and colleagues that enrich each day with their presence. Abundance is ours, at least of the love kind. We’re not much interested in any other kind.

Love defines everything in my life. It conveys faith, forgiveness, redemption, joy, courage, bravery, understanding, and triumph over the moments defined by an absence of love. In the absence of love, there is fear, animus, vitriol, jealousy, loneliness, violence and hatred. Of course life is more complicated, but for the days and nights that have mattered most in my life – love was either there, or it was not. The outcome defined entirely by the same.

This year was beautiful and freeing. Turning forty was something I faced with trepidation, then exaltation. The moments where my breath was taken away are irreplaceable. A note from a dear friend, the carefully stolen moments reading The Cinnamon Peeler’s Wife, and equally – even more resplendent – Six Months in Sudan by Dr. James Maskalyk, or listening to the softness of a violin playing Amazing Grace as I pour over research on the DR Congo, Sudan and South Sudan, Chad, Somalia, Ethiopia, Uganda, and the Central African Republic. Enjoying the music of my daughter’s choice as I make homemade Tandoori chicken and carefully build the layers of flavor into my chocolate for my Christmas truffles also figures into the happiness of life at Girl HQ.

Love is what matters. From it, goodness flows.

This isn’t a new discovery, not at all. Making room for love, in all its forms, seems to be the trick. Eliminating the baggage of negative choices, people, relationships (personal or professional,) and removing obstacles transformed 2012. Rather than chase flickers on the horizon, I enjoyed their light and wrote off negativity as the brief heat-lightning thunderstorms that light up a Summer sky.

The absence of love is all around us as well. It is the 21st Century and yet, governments don’t function with even a modicum of healthy determination. The United States sits on the brink of a “Fiscal Cliff” and our leaders are more concerned with stamping their feet like spoiled children than solving problems. Across the Western world, governments argue rather than legislate. Legislate the wrong things, or in the wrong way, and ignore reality.

The reality is this: we need new leaders, all across the spectrum. Stop working on Band-aids and start the triage for real solutions. Real planning. Real economic resolution. Real human rights discussions and understanding Equality means Equality, and that it is amoral to deny it to any one group – except for hardened criminals that face justice and are sentenced for their crimes.

Equality means immigration reform. And gay marriage. And no longer stacking the deck against our children by prioritizing teacher union leadership over teachers and students. It means developing ethical green energy that doesn’t import cobalt, copper, tin, tantalum, tungsten, and gold from the warlords in Congo and slave labor in China. It means using our own natural resources first: be they solar and wind or natural gas, oil, and hydropower. It means accepting American workers and our environmental protections are the best in the world. It means accepting nothing is perfect or foolproof, and living with the consequences – because it is immoral to have green energy be just another NIMBY (Not In My Back Yard) scheme. It means understanding corn ethanol production has disrupted the food supply, and that isn’t alright. Equality means giving equal and economically sane access to healthcare, jobs, and the marketplace. Freedom means freedom, not anarchy. It means understanding it’s good to have someone who ensures our buildings are safe, and airplanes are maintained, our food supply is clean, that animals in the food chain are treated humanely, and cleaning agents are properly labeled. Religious freedom means not allowing ignorance and bigotry to be pervasive, in our homes or in our government.

It means governance of, by, and for the people.

Let us be civilized. Where there is genocide, let us do what we can to stop it or prevent it. The Greatest Generation ended a genocide, at no small cost to themselves. Hundreds of thousands of Americans and her allies fought, died, sacrificed for the good of the world. It wasn’t just for America, or Europe, or any one nation or people. They did the right thing because that is what a nation of moral people do. They stand shoulder to shoulder and get to work. Our greatest ally, Israel, was born of the horror that was the Holocaust.

There is evil in this world, there is goodness. We must choose wisely and tell the truth. More right and wrong, less Left and Right.

In other words, choose love.

Media Lizzy

Henry Miller…on love

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Oh Henry Miller, my love. Nothing so wonderful as beautiful language and clarity and wonder, all wrapped and intertwined. Many thanks to Maria Popova, of Brainpicker for sharing a quote from Miller’s elusive, romantic side – from The Wisdom of the Heart:

Real love is never perplexed, never qualifies, never rejects, never demands. It replenishes, by grace of restoring unlimited circulation. It burns, because it knows the true meaning of sacrifice. It is life illuminated.

Truth, Mr. Miller. 

—Media Lizzy

Video

Christmas goodness

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This may be the worst Christmas song EVER. But it’s so darn catchy!

Very grateful that my Christmas is as far from this one as is humanly possible. Every time I hear this song, it’s volume up, dork-out, guilty pleasure time!!!

Dante’s other fire…

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An exquisite sentiment from Dante’s La Vita Nuova, Chapter III. This sonnet is breathtaking.

The first three hours of night were almost spent

The time that every star shines down on us

When Love appeared to me so suddenly

That I still shudder at the memory.

Joyous Love, sing to me 

the while he held my heart within his hands

and in his arms, my lady lay asleep wrapped in a veil.

He woke her then, trembling and obedient

She ate that burning heart out of his hand;

Weeping, I saw him then depart from me.

Sentiments, stolen moments known only to the lovers are a ripened fruit. Devoured, consumed and then only a memory. Lovely nonetheless.

Media Lizzy

Goethe.

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Literature soothes when little else will. The complexities of life exist in all eras, in all our souls and bodies. Great love, be it romantic or platonic or familial, is as desired for as oxygen is necessary to breathe. Some walk through life without the desire to summit a mountain, or dive to the depths of the ocean preferring instead to have safety. Other take the risks, in business or in adventurism or in love. They fuel the desire of others, and bathe in its waters.

Individual liberty requires privacy, not only modesty or comity. Johann Wolfgang von Goethe’s Roman Elegies are a wonder. The passage below, from Bid Me Not be Silent, is exquisitely crafted. Citing the unspoken arrangement between two people to craft that privacy, a safe place, a warm comfort in the storm of every day life, Goethe evokes the importance of building an “Ours” on whatever terms or in whatever circumstance. Beauty is in silence as much as it is anything.

Bid me be silent, bid me not speak, Secrecy is a duty to me: I could reveal my heart complete, But Fate doesn’t wish it to be.

In due season, the sun’s bright path Drives the night away, the light must shine: The hard stone opens its breast at last And yields Earth water from hidden mines.

Every man seeks rest in a dear friend’s arms, Where the heart can express its inner pain: But my lips are sealed by secret charms, And none but a god can part them again.

—Media Lizzy

Aware.

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Writing is my love, my work. My mind devours ideas and words then forces them onto the page, virtual and tangible. To still my restlessness, there is literature. Nourishment of the soul, particularly as I found myself turning 40 last month, grows more important.

An avid reader since my days as a  toddler, my nightstand always holds at least four books. Herodotus is my constant companion, Ovidian my love. Ben Coes’ The Last Refuge quenched my thirst for intense, action filled thrillers. It is without question my favorite fiction in a decade. To satisfy my appetite for literature, I turned to DH Lawrence and was utterly satisfied.

For many years, I have much preferred DH Lawrence’s poetry to any of his short stories or novels. Honestly, his poetry holds a richness, a lushness in the language. His other writings are deeply inferior, and absurd in their obvious and eager pursuit of climax.

His poetry though, embodied in Self Pity or Liaison, or Pomegranate communicates. There is an awareness, a presence. It enchants, ignites. The compartmentalized nature of private life, the secrets we keep, the discretion with which we act provides a safety net. Like trapeze artists, we trust the net will hold. In Aware, quoted below, there is the private acknowledgement to self. There is little so exciting as the prospect of a new lover, or a lover’s passion rekindled, and our decision to surrender in the moment. Consequences be damned, at least we are aware.

Slowly the moon is rising out of the ruddy haze,

Divesting herself of her golden shift, and so

Emerging white and exquisite; and I in amaze

See in the sky before me, a woman

I did not know I loved, but there she goes and her beauty hurts my heart;

I follow her down the night, begging her not to depart.

—Media Lizzy

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